I Can Remember...

There are hidden corners in my memory where I store away those sacred moments or memories that awaken my true self. I use them as my "recharge button."

You know those days where you wake up and you feel like you already have a "work hangover" from that day... and it hasn't even started? Or a food hangover from the night before of indulging? Or just an energy hangover from someone that was draining?
Those are the days I wake up not feeling like myself. I feel like I need to start over, or regain my strength with something inspiring. I now know that I am useless for my clients if I have not recharged myself, or at least cleared the residue of negative (or drained) thinking.

Those are the times when I sift through the archives of great memories. Once I feel the smile spread across my face (regarding a memory) then I know that my mind has focused on something more useful, and the "recharge" has begun. Most of the time these memories are the ones where someone displayed a selfless act, or just inspired me with being who they fully were! Nothing gives me more useful energy than remembering how we can help each other. The good news is the everyday people in our lives play some of the best angels!

Some "Recharge Memories" of Mine

I can remember... when I was 16 years old, and I had been cast as the lead in my High School play. At the time my Grandfather was very ill with throat cancer and he had a difficult time leaving the house due to the pain. I had prepared myself and my lines for opening night, but I hadn't prepared myself for seeing my Granddad in the 3rd isle-with the rest of my family--watching me with a big smile on his face. I can remember my energy soaring that night as I realized the pain he must have endured to see me that night. My heart ached at the courage and dedication he demonstrated. It was a true act of selflessness, and he single-handedly changed the course of my life (and how I see things), that very night.


I can remember... the year I moved to San Diego. I had fallen ill with a strong case of anxiety. This was not just any anxiety... this was the kind that crippled you, and made you feel fearful of everything. Ever since I was a child I had dreamed of dancing! It was what fueled my heart the most. So, when I got the offer to audition for a dance piece at my college, I quickly signed up and got my dance clothes ready for the next day audition. At the time, I didn't own a car... and I had to take a 30 minute bus trip to the audition. As I was walking to the bus stop, I came up with all the reasons why I shouldn't audition. I was 2 seconds short of running back home, when a young girl--about 22 years old--approached me and asked where I was going. She noticed my dance gear and I noticed her wheel chair. She couldn't have been more cheerful, so before I knew it we had started a conversation and the bus was already there to pick us up. I didn't have time to run back!
She pulled her wheelchair up beside me on the bus and asked me all about dancing. Her eyes lit up when I told her where I was going. When the bus finally came to her stop, she held my hand and closed her eyes for a brief moment... and then she said,
"Will you dance for me today?"
"I've always dreamed of being a dancer, and I can only do it in my mind." "Can I imagine you auditioning?" "It would give me the greatest joy to see you getting that part!"
As tears rolled down my cheeks, she rolled her wheelchair down the isle of the bus. She waved before she got off, and I instantly felt the energy I needed to dance.
Later that day, I danced joyfully for her AND fearlessly for me... and landed the part!
Even if I hadn't landed the part. She had restored my energy with her zest for life, and her fearless attitude.


I can remember... a 5 year old client I saw last year. We were working with her recurring bouts of wetting the bed at night. *Energetically speaking we usually see this issue as one of fear. So, I started asking her questions of what she might be fearful of at night, or even during the day. The answers that came from her mouth were incredibly insightful.
She told me that she was afraid of growing older. When I asked her why, she said that "you forget to play when you get old." She said, "If I get better, will you teach my Mom how to play again?"
I asked her why her Mom doesn't play, and she said "She doesn't play anymore because she's always sad."
I asked her what life would be like if she could always play. She said, "Perfect!"
I find such a peace in hearing the innate wisdom of children. If only we could remember to keep these insights and that candid nature as we grow older.
That little girl reminded me to play again! I now play as much as I can!


I hold these memories close to my heart as great reminders to show up for myself and others. There are so many more, and I find it reassuring and peaceful to know that all I need is a few quick memories to re-boot my day. Try writing down some of your fondest memories, and see how fast you start feeling a boost of energy.
What memories are you making for others right now?

Here's to living fully!

Feeding The Heart

This past weekend I taught a cooking class. The theme for the class was "Foods, Herbs, and Spices that benefit the Heart."

As I began demonstrating the recipes, I couldn't resist the smiles and laughs that crept from my mouth as I began telling stories about the dishes. Each one had a different tale, a different experience, and a therapeutic moment for me. I couldn't help but feel uplifted by the lemons as I squeezed them to make the Hawthorn Lemonade. The simple smell took me back to the first time I learned to ride a horse in Andalucia, Spain. A dear woman named Stephanie kindly invited me into her home when she saw that I was crying--from not being able to fully canter on the horse. She offered me a fresh glass of homemade lemonade, and told me stories that lifted my heart. The infusion of the fresh lemons and the sweetness of her personal stories made the sadness melt.

Another recipe involved homemade garlic aioli. This was no ordinary--kinda garlicky-aioli, but the kind where your whole body sweats garlic afterwards (the very best kind!) This brought me back to the first time that I tried calamares con aioli (calamari with garlic aioli.)
At the age of 11, the sound of squid with some "crazy mayonnaise sauce" sounded about as good as a kick to the head. However, copying what my Grandfather was eating... was just about the wisest thing I could think of at the time. So, I braved the fried squid and licked my fingers clean after tasting the divine sauce that came with it. *Luckily, my Mom had introduced us to a lot of garlic at a young age, and had used it as a healing remedy for many things (including numerous earaches.)
To this day, I make a big batch of super-garlicky aioli anytime I feel the onset of any cold or other illness. I can always see my Grandparents smiling faces as they watched my first reaction to "Calamares con Aioli."


There's just nothing like a berry cobbler or crisp in the middle of summer that calls you back home. Back home to Missouri for me! My stepfather's parents lived in a very small town outside of Kansas City, called Excelsior Springs. Every summer we'd take a road trip to visit them, and what I can remember the most were the mouth watering cobblers and crisps that came pouring out of the kitchen when we'd arrive.
I can literally smell the caramelized blackberry and raspberry juices as the berries bubbled up from the buttery crust in the oven. It was as if the divine juices shared a common language with my heart. My heart just seemed to jump for joy, and all I could care about was sinking my teeth into that delicious crisp--suddenly my deep concerns of beating my sister at Super Mario Brother's amounted to just about nothing.


In class, I emphasized the healing properties of each ingredient I was using. I also began to emphasize the emotions that feed the heart, as well. I almost feel that the emotions fuel us more than the actual ingredients do. However, I feel that together--the food, and the love--create a most perfect symbiotic relationship. I could actually feel my heart warming as I remembered the love I felt from the memories of these dishes. I could imagine that my blood was circulating better, and that my digestion was stronger.
As I work with Heart clients; I have them imagine loving their food. I also bring back the recipes they loved as a child. It's incredible for me to watch their reactions. Adding the ingredient of LOVE, changes any "bad" food to something inherently healing. I have seen it in action!
The real key is to get the food to be as close to the Earth as possible, and to keep the chemical-lab processed foods to the very minimum. We want our food to love us back, and in order for the food to do this... it must have a similar energy to our own. In other words, you can still have a processed "Hamburger Helper" love you back, but you can imagine the energy and memories it will take to do this? Whereas, foods from the earth--mixed with loving memories--take very little extra energy and focus on your part (because the Earth has already done much of the work for you.) This is how the healing begins and continues!

I can teach about healing foods and spices till the cows come home (and I guess that's not the worst idea, since I'm counting on some ice cream for that berry cobbler I just made.) However, if we aren't loving those foods and spices while eating them, then what benefit can they have to such a loving organ as our dear heart? Only you can answer that for yourself. What I will say for me personally is that I have now found the most incredible peace and endearing joy in loving my food. Loving the old memories, and creating the new. I have also found that my heart stretches that much more when I experience food with inspiration, creativity, laughter and loving people.

When it comes to Heart Disease... we must remember not only to feed the body, but to also open our hearts enough emotionally to make sure it is fully nourished.

The Following are a list of beneficial foods for the Heart (as well as some loving recipes!):

Fresh, Non Rancid Wheat Germ

Wheat Berries – Organic Hard Red Winter Wheat

Wheat Berry Tea

Wheat Berry Rejuvelac

Sprouted Wheat – then cooked or raw

Other Vitamin E rich foods such as green cabbage

All chlorophyll rich foods including kale and cabbage.

Calcium & Magnesium rich foods

Healthy Oils / Fats – especially olive oil

Seeds & Nuts – including chia, flax, & hemp

Wheat Grass & other “cereal / grain” grasses & algaes

After Wheat (if gluten intolerant) then brown rice & oats (free of gluten)

Vitamin C rich foods including rose hips, bell peppers, etc.

Silica rich foods (barley, oat, cucumber, celery, lettuce)

Onions, chives, leeks, garlic.

All Mushrooms – especially reishi / ling zhi

Nutritional Yeast with calcium & magnesium

Lecithin with calcium & magnesium

Fruits – especially Hawthorn Berries & other berries

Spices: Cayenne, ginger, garlic, Rosemary, Turmeric, Horseradish, Peppers

Heart meat (if carnivore)

Bee Pollen

Honey (in moderation)

Mung beans & sprouts, lentils & sprouts, & other beans

Niacin rich foods including all grains (especially brown rice), nutritional yeast, legumes / beans & their sprouts.

Rutin from buckwheat

B-Vitamin rich foods – especially wheat bran & wheat germ

For Heart Sadness, grief & heart depression:

· L-Tryptophan rich foods including hormone free turkey & room temperature quality milk (if not reactive or allergic to) (before bed).

· Brown rice, wheat germ, cucumber, apples, cabbage, kuzu (kudzu) root, algaes, apple cider vinegar, nutritional yeast.

· Edible flowers – especially borage, nasturtium, chamomile

Fish: Especially salmon, sardines, & other deep / cold-water fish. Not fried or overcooked!

(Courtesy of Steve Schechter)



Heart Recipes (Courtesy of Christy Russell):

Hawthorn Lemonade

Ingredients:
2 ¼ C. Hawthorn Tea (8 bags steeped in 3 cups water)
1 ¼ C. Honey-Mint syrup (recipe follows)
1 ¼ C. Freshly Squeezed Lemon Juice
2 C. Sparkling Water (I used Gerolsteiner)
Ice

Directions:
Pour all ingredients in a Pitcher and stir well! Pour into iced glasses and enjoy with a happy heart!


Honey-Mint Syrup
Ingredients:
½ C. Fresh chopped mint
1 Cup Water
1 Cup Honey (If using raw honey, add after you have boiled the water)

Directions:
In saucepan, bring ingredients to a boil, stirring until honey is dissolved. Simmer syrup, for 2 minutes. Pour syrup through a fine sieve, pressing hard on mint, and cool. Keep covered and chilled.
NOTE* Lemonade is pictured above with muddled blueberries and mint... and topped with edible flowers.



Garlic Aioli

Ingredients:
2 T. minced garlic
1 organic egg at room temperature
¾ C olive oil
1 T. fresh lemon juice
½ tsp sea salt

Directions:
In a food processor, blend the garlic with the egg. With the motor running, add the olive oil in a very slow stream until the aioli is thick. Add the lemon juice and salt, and blend again.

Your heart will LOVE this!



Wheat-Free Oat Berry Crisp

Filling:
2 Cups Blackberries
2 Cups Raspberries
3 T. Lemon Juice
2 T. Orange Juice
Zest of 1 lemon
Zest of 1 orange
3/4 C Rapadura Sugar (unrefined sugar)
Pinch of salt

Crisp:
1 C Oats
1 C Oat Flour
1 tsp Cinnamon
½ tsp Nutmeg
½ C Rapadura Sugar
½ C Coconut oil (chilled!)

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
(Filling):
In a large bowl, stir in sugar, berries, zest, juice, and pinch of salt. Pour into a shallow
2 ½ to 3 quart baking dish.

(Crisp):
In a bowl combine flour, oats, ½ cup sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Stir until combined. Cut in the coconut oil. Squeeze the flour mixture together between your fingers and crumble on top of Berry Filling. Set dish on a foil lined baking pan.

Bake in the oven for 60-70 minutes until the juices are bubbling and the crisp is browned on top. Allow the crisp to cool for 45 minutes and then serve warm or cool with a little vanilla yogurt.

*NOTE: If you would like a thicker berry filling, add 1-2 T. of oat flour to the berry mixture to thicken in like a cobbler.
For a calming effect on the heart, you can add 3 T. of culinary lavender buds to the berry mixture for a Lavender Crisp!! The picture above shows you the beautiful colors of the filling! ENJOY~

"Why do we WAIT?"

So... one day a dear man's wife dies from pancreatic cancer. The very next day he signs up for dance classes... as this was the only thing his wife ever asked him to do when she was alive, and it was the only thing that he refused to do--because he was too embarrassed and didn't want to look like a fool. "Later, my dear", he would always say to her.

"It's interesting how looking like a fool sounds incredibly enticing after someone you love has passed." -He says

"I have never felt more alive and closer to her than I do when I'm dancing all those 'foolish' dances."
-He smiles

"Why do we wait?" -He sighs

His question made me ask the same of myself. WHY DO I WAIT? What am I waiting for exactly, and what makes me think that "later" is a better time? Is there really another time than right now?
So, instead of looking at the "goals" or "wish" lists that I had made over the last year. I decided to just start right now. That is to say; when someone asked me if I wanted to do something that sounded even remotely interesting or full of life changing adventures, I was going to say "Absolutely!"

I'm pretty confident the Universe found this new mission of mine quite entertaining. Not a hour later, my husband comes home and asks me point blank to go skydiving with him on Monday afternoon (back story: I had given my husband, Sage, a pass for skydiving 2 years prior and I had always refused to go with him because of my deep fear of jumping from a plane. So, yes, for 2 years he looked for someone to go with him... and somehow it never worked out with anyone else.)

I looked at him, took a deep breath, and said "Absolutely!" with almost no hesitancy.
What still amazes me, is that he knew to ask even after I had said "NO" for 2 long years. (It supports my theory that kindred spirits reflect and support our highest good even when we forget.)

So, cut to... 3 days later, Monday--Go Time!
Everything from that day, I can remember like I was painting it detail by detail. I could feel and became aware of every muscle and every emotion I was feeling. It was literally impossible not to feel alive! The whole experience was incredible, but the moment I remember most vividly was the very second before I jumped. My toes were literally hanging off the side of the plane, and as I looked down and saw the beautiful Earth below, I knew that I had no choice but to truly "let go." There was nothing to control anymore. I could feel the air in my hair, and I could hear freedom calling me forward. I asked myself, "what's the BEST that can happen?" That question alone brought on a huge smile, and then there was no need to jump. I just leaped into the air and laughed! It was drizzling that day, so the soft rain pellets disguised the joyful tears that streaked my face! I flew effortlessly with no need for control or fear.

Those brief moments are now etched in my cellular memory and soul. I can see a new map of freedom being drawn up in my body. I can feel "absolutely" rushing through my blood. "Later" or "Never" didn't show up that day. I chose to show up instead!

Do something you love or fear right now. I find it beautiful how some of the very things we fear turn into our greatest loves. Wait not for the days where you will think back, and ask "Why did I wait?"


This wonderful man dances every Thursday. He says that for that whole hour, he forgets himself. All he cares about is looking like a fool and dancing in the arms of the beautiful lady that taught him how to be truly alive!

"We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance."
~Japanese Proverb~

(A special thank you to Kaylee Ellingson for the inspiration!)